Taking Criticism Like a Champ

JC Cadena as Gudelia at the Frida Kahlo Theater

Taking Criticism Like a Champ

It is difficult to take criticism like a champ sometimes.  Its difficult to hear it.  Colleagues pointing out my mistakes. When in honesty, their cues to me were incorrect.  Trust me I can start pointing out people's mistakes.  But that is not what its all about. I know the mistakes I've made.  I know them.  I heard them and I more than anyone else is extremely, painfully beating myself up for it.

Time and time again I hear these comments, even at the rehearsal process. Rehearsal is had for the discovery of the character.  At least that is my tactic, that is how I work.

Its very disappointing for hear a fellow actor time and time again walk straight pass me and talk about my performance.  Really, you are talking about my performance and what I did wrong.  I'm very happy you are looking at my performance.  But shouldn't you really look at your own personal performance.  Trust me I'm looking at mine.

JC Cadena as Gudelia 

After every play, I go home and I dissect what went wrong and how I can fix it.   I have to tell you mistakes are sometimes fun.  But of course my goal is to have the most amazing performance, mistakes and all ( if any).

The personal toll that this criticism takes on me, hits my heart.  Like an arrow, straight through it.   Its hard not to think that there is something wrong with me.  Its sad that this is the way I must work with some actors.

Its not fun being the odd man out.  Then all the other actors start bonding over "expectations." Its so difficult to not be part of this complaining group.  I have to distance  myself from this and in turn I have to distance myself from people.  I have to 1) focus on my performance 2) i'm the lead, so i have to keep the rhythm of the play 3) keep moving, get up move and the lines easily flow.

But I have to learn to take criticism and take it for what it is.  I can grow from it.  It fuels me, it makes me work harder.  It makes me see people for who they really are.  It makes me a better person, a better actor and a better friend.